Fading
by MamaMeu
Summary: Fading is the Humanstuck summer story of Gamzee's slowly ruined mind, his past, and his love for Nepeta. It is rated M for violence, drug use, and sex. It is part of the Summer Vacation collection. (Nepeta And Gamzee are not usually a shipping of mine but it worked for this.) I do not own Homestuck or it's characters.
1. Cracking

Cracking

Gamzee Makara sat in the middle of the littered floor of red plastic cups and pie tins silently. His dark eyes roamed over the coffee table that now held spilt liquor, an empty bowl, and what he was most sure was a line of cocaine. He had watched each person one by one leave his household and feared this moment with great certainty. Now Gamzee was left to the disturbing thoughts of his mind and no distraction to push back the constant images in his mind. After Jade had left so had Tavros and slowly everyone else as well. The last person to leave had surprisingly been a sober Eridan Ampora, who for once had not hit on a single person. Instead he had simply watched as the love of his life had walked away with another.

The dark void of quiet seemed to thrum in his eardrums. It was two in the morning now, and everyone but he would most likely be asleep. This disturbed him only more. Rising slowly from his place on the ground he shuffled solemnly in his purple polka-dotted pants up to the third floor of the spacious mansion. At the entrance to the hallway that led to his bedroom though he stared blankly as it seemed to only slide away further.

Slipping the pill bottle from his hoodie pocket he dumped a few into his hand before crunching on them. He swallowed dryly. He didn't know if he could last this a whole summer. The mental images were getting worse, and the throbbing of a slow burning anger had been rising within his mind for a while now.

_Stop it. _

The images stopped.

Picking himself up off the white carpet he sauntered into the nearest bathroom and placed his elbows on the countertop, his face in his hands. When he looked up his hands pulled the skin of his lower lid down slightly exposing his bloodshot eyes. With a groan Gamzee ran his fingers into his hair and gripped tightly as he stared at the Gamzee in the mirror. His voice was a mere whisper and his lips seemed to hardly move.

"Gamzee motherfucking Makara," the tight tension in his hands slowly released before falling back to his sides "…Gamzee motherfucking Makara…"

Using his palms he applied pressure to his eyes, struggling to keep back the tears that had formed in the corners of his eyes. His breathing was shaky as he slowly slid down to the bathroom tile rocking back and forth there. Makara. Why did he have to be a goddamn Makara?!

Wiping his nose with the back of his hand he allowed himself to sit back against the wall and pull out his phone. Very few people would answer his call so late, and the few that would, where loyal to his family name out of fear. Nonetheless he dialed the number and waited. Gamzee was still rocking, much less now but the habit was still there as he awaited an answer.

_Pick up. Please pick up. Please please please…._

"Hello?" The British voice thick with slumber finally answered.

A long pause, "Highblood."

"Gamzee! My name is motherfucking Gamzee so call me by it!" He was about to flip his shit, god how he hated when people of the inner circle called him that.

"My apologies High- Gamzee. I am here. What is it you wish?"

Gamzee calmed once again. There was the sound of pills rattling as he shoved a few in his mouth and across the line Equius cringed silently. "Well my wicked brother, I was wondering if you might want to come over and crack open a bottle of Faygo together or uh slam some sick beats together."

Silence.

"Very well."


	2. Memories

_Hi everyone! I apologies for my recent lateness! I've had these pieces written but haven't had time to type them up due to complications with my health and schooling! Thanks for taking the time to read my fan fictions by the way, a new one is in the works for an avid reader demonofdark who by the way wrote a recent piece you should all check out! The new story will be over the Undertaker (HEART) from the manga Black Butler! Anywho, hope you enjoy the new chapter!_

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Memories

Equius arrived about thirty minutes after hanging up. He was around the same height as Gamzee only far broader. The eighteen year old kid was known for his rippling muscles and expertise in robotics, but he was not highly associated with due to his social awkwardness and his habit of excessive sweating when nervous. Equius didn't seem to mind too much though. Unlike most he was raised knowing his place in society and respected it greatly.

The young boy took his normal seat upon the couch and watched as Gamzee curled up resting his head on Equius's lap. He would fall asleep that way in the comfort of another person's presence and wake in the morning to an empty household.

When Gamzee did wake Equius was gone much to his expectations and he rose rubbing the slumber away from his eyes as well as the dreaming of the deep horrific "chuckle voodoo's" as his brother Kurloz had once called them. A painful memory flashed across his brain as his brother came to mind. Violent screaming, glinting of metal, and the look of hatred burning deep into his body.

Inhaling sharply Gamzee shoved the painful memory from his thoughts while gripping his hair in painful knots before rushing upstairs.

He kept his head down not daring to look down the ominously dark hallways of his life before him. Gamzee had memorized the number of footsteps into the bathroom and into his own bedroom. There was no need to look up or let his eyes wander. Once in the bathroom he began the drudged work of pulling a brush through his thick black hair that curled and knotted without any hope of redemption.

After that he applied the makeup.

Wearing the makeup of a clown had become a thing for him after the first time he had learned how truly disturbed his parents were. Now he could perform smooth lines with a brush without even a second thought.

Gamzee was born under the lineage of the Makara's, a grand group of ancient blood known for their use of power in The Dark Carnival to serve one master. The Dark Carnival was known to be a sort of family emblem with the sign of the Capricorn as its image. The family of Makara was only a single branch though that served in blind faith towards the one known as Condesce. The second family was known as the Amporas. Outside of this tight knit group little was known and that which was known was commonly ignored under the blissful thought of ignorance.

Gamzee looked over his now covered face, rising his chin a bit to look at each sharp jawline and make sure it was perfect.

He could still remember the night he realized how twisted and dark of a family he was born into was if he wished. In horrific remembrance he could recall the way his older brother Kurloz had always worn the face of a juggalo. When this had started Gamzee had thought little of it. Kurloz had always worn dark clothing and been into heavy metal music. He did odd things and was into drugs and partying with his girlfriend who was his polar opposite. So for Kurloz to start wearing clown makeup each day it was, normal.

What Gamzee hadn't realized was, Kurloz had been taking Gamzee's beatings for years and never said a word about it.

A legend was said that a prodigal child would be born upon the time of the Caprious who would smite the ignorance of the Mirthful Messiah for all time. Before its birth though a child of preparation would be born from the same womb from which he came. Kurloz was born with great promise, and his parents had raised him well under the impression that they would bring forth clarity into the world with their son. Gamzee was born only three years later.

Soon after his birth Kurloz became the sacrifice to the Mirthful Messiah's in place of Gamzee, and Gamzee was raised to be the prodigal child foretold.

Kurloz never said a word and tried to influence Gamzee in the best of ways he could. Gamzee had only been ten when he had first heard Kurloz's screams from the office room. When he had finally had the courage to peek in the memory had stained his mind forever. Upon the wall a good few new dents pocketed into the plaster and Kurloz had laid across the ground with dark bruises covering his body and blood from his cracked head was pooling over the ground in a slow thick like way beneath him.

Six years later Kurloz would cease to feel pain…

Gamzee blinked at his reflection before shoving a few pills from the bottle in his pocket into his mouth and crunching them desperately, "Get outa my brain motherfucker…" he whispered softly before pulling out his phone to distract himself.

Two new messages.

TT: _uH, HEY MAN I'M SORRY ABOUT BAILING EARLY. mY MOM NEEDED ME TO COME HOME CAUSE WE HAVE CHURCH TODAY._

CC: HEY ASSHOLE! CALL ME WHEN YOU GET THIS MESSAGE!

The clown couldn't help but chuckle at the first two messages not replying right away when his phone vibrated in his hand making him pause on its journey back to his pocket.

AG: _you up yet gamzee?_

He stared at it for a moment his mood suddenly swinging back into darkness.

TC: _YeAh I'm MoThErFuCkInG uP_

AG: _can i stop 8y?_

Why the fuck would she want to stop by?

TC: _I tHoUgHt YoU aNd MoThErFuCkInG eGbErT wHeRe ToGeThEr_

A long moment passed before the spiderbitch finally sent her reply on the other side of the line.

AG: _we are_

TC: sO wHaT dO yOu BiTcHeN wAnT?

AG: _to talk_

TC: _FiNe. HuRrY uP i GoT mOtHeRfUcKiNg WiCkEd PlAnS_

AG: _surrrrrrrre Gamzee :::;) _


	3. Strangers

**I just felt I need to tell you all that no Nepeta/Gamzee is not my OTP but I love them both, and for this particular fanfiction they work well together. Enjoy!**

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Strangers

Gamzee didn't want to waste his time with the spiderbitch. This Capricorn had motherfucking shit to fuck up. She would be pissed, no doubt, but at this point he couldn't seem to give a shit. His anger was becoming more of a problem lately and this worried him. Shaking his head he walked over to the kitchen and opened cabinets looking around aimlessly. The problem was Vriska always ended up caving, that was just one of her characteristics, no matter how tough she tried act she wasn't all she made herself out to be. She was weak and once had been lonely, just like him.

Pulling out a glass jar from the collection of others he popped open the lid and pulled out a sandwich baggie filled with his escape. Nah, he wouldn't be here when she got here, he didn't have time for that and it'd be a motherfucking miracle if he was still there in the empty heart of the house. His fingers pinched an amount and began to pull out a hit when his phone sounded of in a series of honking making his drop his load.

"SHIT!" Gamzee's face pulled down in anger as he began cleaning up the mess he'd created before the device went off again moving on the countertop. Snatching up the phone he hit the accept call button not even bothering to look at the ID and was about to scream some unmerciful strings of words when the voice on the other line made his words shoot back down to his stomach.

"Gamzee? Gamzee are you there it's Nepeta." Tears were thick in the anime lovers voice.

Swallowing carefully he replied, "Yeah Nep I'm motherfucking here…"

"Um I was wondering if it might be purossible for you to come by later? I know it's been a long time sense we spoken, and I'm not sure why, but… Gam could you please come by?"

"Are you okay Nepeta? Do you need to get ahold of Equius? Karkat?"

On the other end of the conversation the feline shook her head furiously before speaking, "No, no he wouldn't understand. And Karkitty and I…aren't speaking right now…"

"Okay Nep, I'll swing by after my shows over… Can you wait that long?"

"Yes."

"Okay… I'll see you soon ninja."

"See you."

The highblood hung up the phone before shaking his head and collecting the scattered pinch of marijuana and pulling out his pipe from the same cabinet. He filled the bowl, lit the dried leafs, and inhaled deeply. Today was just getting stranger and stranger.

After finishing off his remedy Gamzee headed out. Vriska would be almost here now and he didn't want to be caught dead with her true, but the memory of Nepeta's choked voice was distracting him from even that as he hit the beach and began the show.


	4. Old Friend

Old Friend

Gamzee had created a one act show of juggling on the beach. Pretty simple if one knew how to juggle, except when he juggled everything was on fire. Money was not a needed thing for him obviously and so he did it more so for the thrill of it all than anything else. So as the golden flames passed his face in a blazing heat he felt infinitely untouchable. Normally this feeling of power was thrilling to him, but today it only seemed to dig into his mind at a weak attempt to distract him from the sound of Nepeta's voice.

Now Gamzee Makara walked in an eerie silence into his past. The highblood had not visited the Leijon household in two years. Partially because of his year in rehabilitation, and partially for his year of pure fear. Nepeta and Gamzee had grown in childhood together for as long as he could remember. Kurloz had not been born a mute, but after a rather horrific "accident" he had been only able to communicate with the deaf Meulin Leijon. Over time the two had grown close together and slowly fell in love during high school. Kurloz had always brought his younger brother with him into the household of the Leijon without a single protest, Gamzee had not known at the time it was to protect him.

The night of Kurloz's death Meulin and he had gotten into a rather large fight. Kurloz, always so gentle in his silence had struck Meulin in his pure anger. Unable to forgive himself he left the house in a hurry and fled into the embrace of familiarity. Before Meulin and Kurloz had become friends, he had slipped into the world of drugs and chemical embodiments that numbed ones pain. He had quit at the age of seventeen when Meulin had told him to choose the drugs or her.

That night Kurloz had felt no way to escape the pain he had caused the one he loved and the fear of the monster he felt he would soon become. Overdose had brought Kurloz's life to a quick end. Meulin unable to forgive herself for their spat promptly left town and had rarely been heard of sense. Gamzee… Gamzee had had other problems...

Kurloz's funeral had been a shameful thing. There were no flowers or people to mourn for his death, Gamzee could remember staring into the ground which had swallowed his brother up silencing Kurloz forever and with it his belief of immortality. The head stone was no more than a marker which said his name and date of birth and death. His parents had not bothered to attend...

Gamzee's father's voice yelled clearly in his head…

"_Good radiance to the shit head of boy! What a disgusting motherfucking excuse for a first son! I hope the motherfucker burns in hell!" _

_ "Love you shouldn't speak that way…" Gamzee's mother trying to calm the beast down…_

_ "Shut up you dumb bitch! You don't know anything do you huh?!" There is a scream then as her tall and beautiful form crumples to the ground as Gamzee's father strikes out at her andger like fire in his eyes. _

_ Gamzee, too stupid to understand to innocent to comprehend had run to his father trying to stop him, "Dad! Stop it! You're hurting her!"_

_ "SHUT THE FUCK UP AND WATCH! YOU WILL NOT BE A COWARD LIKE YOUR BROTHER!"_

_"Kurloz wasn't a coward…" a sudden slow rage was growing in the pit of his vision, the room was beginning to spin with violent red splotches that filled his vision as his father continued to insult his own flesh and blood._

_ "HA! YOUR BROTHER WAS A MOTHERFUCKING COWARD! AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE HE WAS YOU LITTLE SON OF A BITCH?! HE WAS A BASTARD! A MOTHERFUCKING BASTARD AND I'M GLAD PIECE OF SHIT IS MOTHERFUCKING DEAD!"_

_ Suddenly Gamzee was screaming at the top of his longs and tackling his father to the ground. There was the sound of a sickening crunch of bone beneath his fists as his knuckles connected with the sharp bridge of his father's nose blood suddenly filled the space between them, chocking them both with its wretched stench. His fist just continued to connect with the bastard's face again and again and again… In the background his mother screamed for Gamzee to stop, but the blood pounding in his head let him hear nothing else but the disturbing sound of his father's laughter. Gamzee's father didn't fight back her chew him out, he laid there beneath Gamzee as his teeth popped out and his face was drenched in crimson life he simply took each punch. _

_Suddenly the sounds of police sirens filled the air but Gamzee continued until men in crisp navy polyester wrenched him off his father. Gamzee's father rose and by this time the young blood was becoming dizzy with fatigue. The spell of anger had come and gone like a crisp breeze and now he slumped over with blood covered knuckles and splattered face with his hands bound behind his back in metal cuffs._

"_I'm glad to see you aren't as weak as your brother was my son…"_

Gamzee's father was smart. He hadn't taken a single swing back at Gamzee so that he would be in no way able to be blamed. Gamzee had been placed in a mental institution for a year for his consequences and hadn't seen either of his parents sense the day they brought him home from the hospital. A weekly check came in the mail for any of his personal expenses and besides that they never spoke.

The highblood hadn't noticed that during the train of memories that had suddenly surged through his head, he had made his way all the way to Nepeta's street. His phone's vibrations against his thigh had dragged him back to reality. Pulling it out from his pocket he quickly answered and did not bother to check the ID as he walked closer, "Hello?"

Vriska's voice came screeching through the phone. "Where the hell were you?! I came to your house to see you and where you there?! Of course not you worthless stoner! Where the hell were you?!"

Why the hell hadn't he bothered to check the ID?

With a sigh Gamzee began to try to speak only to be interrupted by Vriska's furry, "No! Don't You dare fucking speak you hear me?! I'm out! The deals over you piece of shit and you make sure your parents get the message because my mother can pay for her own rotten debt! I refuse to be married to waste of life like you!"

Click.

His feet had taken him to the front lawn of the Leijon household.

Out.

The spider bitch couldn't possibly be serious.

She couldn't…

She wouldn't…

Sighing the highblood shook his head before walking up to the front door and tapping the end of his juggling pin against the door. There was the soft sound of cats meowing and howling in protest as someone on the other side of the door shooed them away and grasped the nod. Gamzee silently calculated its slow movement. Then again perhaps it wasn't slow but he was. He could still feel the tranquil calm in his blood stream from his medication despite the vivid flashbacks of his minds own doing.

The forest green door's paint was chipping sense the last time he had been here and the clear signs of cat claws scratching were imbedded into the wood. It made a low creaking sound as it opened, and Gamzee's eyes followed the base's movement back to reveal to blue socked feet and oversized pajama pants.

There was a small intake of breath as though his presence had startled the person at the door. And perhaps he had after all because Nepeta hadn't seen anything but a fading wisp of him in the long period of two years.

Gamzee waited, closing his eyes and listening for the sound of the door slamming shut as she changed her mind, but no such sound came. Instead, the startling embrace of her thin arms around his and her warm body pressing against his chest made his eyes flash open and his juggling pins clatter to the concrete floor.

Suddenly the highblood was gasping for breath through tears as his arms wrapped around his old friend and held her tightly. Oh merciful messiahs how he had missed her without even realizing this. Silent tears, bittersweet ran down each of their faces. When Nepeta and Gamzee finally parted they laughed and blushed with embarrassment quickly wiping the tears from their eyes.

The Capricorn swallowed roughly, "You okay? You sounded really motherfucking upset…"

"Um, yes, I surrpose. Why don't you come inside and we'll talk, you look hungry."

Gamzee hadn't thought he was hungry, but the growl from his stomach made him shortly realize he was indeed very hungry. "Sure Nepeta."

Nepeta smiled shakily and slipped her hand into his before pulling him inside. His feet weaved carefully around the cat littered floor and he shut the door carefully behind him, stepping into the household filled with his only good memories and one of the worst.


	5. Authors Note

So sorry to get your hopes up but no this is not a new chapter. This is another author's note. Yes, I am going to continue and soon but I have been out of state sense summer break started and just got home. I will be updating this story ASAP, probably within the week for my dear beloved followers and again thank you for your commentary!

Also, those of you who also follow my FanFiction "It's Complicated", at the moment that story is on hold due to a lack of inspiration. Phooey.

And finally I have put up a new story that has nothing to do with this one but is humanstuck fanfiction in case any of you want to read it.

3

anon: this is humanstuck?

roosewe: thank you so much! I always worry my style is too hard to understand. I really hope you enjoy where I will be going with this story and continue reading.


	6. Trouble

Authors Note:

So, not going to lie I really suck at writing for Nep so yeah.

Forewarning there is some context that could be considered character bashing in here but I love all (well almost all) of the Homestuck characters. Please keep in mind this is just a story.

Sorry it's short, will update again ASAP.

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Trouble

Nepeta Leijon slept peacefully for her afternoon catnap on Gamzee Makara's lap. The feline had grown extremely in the past two years and Gamzee could not complain to be fully honest. She had always been small in stature and personality, but at the age of seventeen she looked to have become a woman overnight. She was still as petite as ever and only came up to Gamzee's chest, but she had grown small curves in her breasts and buttocks, apparently a late bloomer.

"Where have you been in my life so motherfucking long…" Of course, the answer was it had been his own fault. That for a year he had been placed in the nut house and while the other year had been a blank haze of drugs and parties…

_"Karkat dumped me a few days before school ended so about last week. He said that we just weren't meant to be and he had too much on his plate for a relationship." Nepeta rolled her tear brimming eyes as she said this, holding a glass bottle of Sour Apple Faygo and quietly picking at her anchovy covered pizza slice. "Of course I knew better but I wanted to believe that was the reason so badly…"_

_ Gamzee listened intently. He had destroyed his five slices of pizza and chugged down three bottles of Grape Faygo, not to mention that he had his forth in hand still. He honestly couldn't believe Karkat had dumped Nepeta. Sure he had tried to pay as little attention to the two as possible, but now he was feeling like a pretty fucking shitty motherfucker. The problem was, Karkat had said nothing, and Karkat had also not bothered to tell Gamzee. Well, at least that he could remember…_

_ "Well, today I went to the grocery store to buy some stuff, and when I was walking out, I saw him and the new girl Terezi arm in arm…" Soft tears had started to streak down her face at the mention of this. She looked up swallowing back anymore tears and laughed faintly, "I didn't know who to talk to. Equius has always disappurroved of Karkat and I being he is practically homeless… But it doesn't hurt any less…_

Now, Nepeta lay curled up with her head on his lap.

With a sigh Gamzee leaned back and contemplated watching some TV only to realize that the remote was no were within reach. With a sigh he carefully removed his phone from his pocket and began to flip through his inbox.

CC: WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU FUCKASS? I TOLD YOU TO FUCKING CALL ME.

Gamzee was about to reply to Karkat's message when his fingers hesitated and the memory of Nepeta's tears pushed through his mind like a bulldozer through a barricade. He had done this to her. He had made her cry this and now he was calling him like nothing happened? "Motherfucker…" He mumbled under his breath before setting his phone aside and clenching his jaw.

Perhaps it wasn't fair of him to judge so quickly. Maybe Karkat had simply not gotten around to discussing it with him… Gamzee swallowed dryly as he thought more and more about it. No, Vantas wouldn't have said anything because just like everyone else he thought Gamzee to be pretty fucking incompetent. Everyone believed that about him though, because Gamzee Makara had lived his life behind the shadows of reality…

Nepeta stirred snapping Gamzee's attention back to reality like a taunt rubber band. "Gamzee…?" She murmured after a moment of blinking.

"Hey…" He replied softly pushing back a stray hair from her hat with the tip of his finger. "Sleep well?"

The female giggled before sitting up and stretching out her back like a young kitten. "It was purrfect. I dreamed of being a young huntress in the amazon forest!"

Gamzee gave a deep chuckle before sitting back with his hands behind his head as he looked at her. "You busy tonight?" He asked rather curiously.

Scrunching her nose and then giving it a small wiggle she scratched her head lightly, "Not that I can remember…"

There was a flip of excitement and nervousness that coursed through his head down through his chest and into his stomach were it bounced about a bit before shooting through his toes. The highblood couldn't resist the grin that touched his lips, "Oh? Well you wanna go to the old cinema theater with me?"

"Sure!" She answered in a quick squeak before blushing and looking down. Gamzee laughed whole heartedly before kissing her cheek.

He wasn't sure were the notion had come from and barreled through his head but it had and he had acquired the action as easily as picking up a bottle of Faygo. He swallowed nervously and shifted his hips slightly before glancing at her with wide black eyes speckled with indigo, their lashes brushing the tips of his raven dark hair.

"I uh… I motherfucking should have not…"

Nepeta cut him off sharply with a nervous wave of her hand as she blushed deeply. "It's okay Gamzee I don't mind… I'm going to go get ready and we can leave in an hour?"

"Uh, sure motherfucker I'll just go grab some cash and be back…"


	7. A Rare Gift

Authors Notes:

So for this chapter I was trying to bring out some comedy… I apologize if I failed. It's a bit longer than normal for this fanfic but I think I did okay haha.

flyingkitties20: Thank you! To be honest it was not a big ship for me until I started writing this fanfic. It wasn't actually supposed to be a romance, but along the way it just sort of turned into one as I realized that if you canon Gamzee and Kurloz as brothers then the Leijons and Makaras would be rather close in humanstuck. Glad you enjoy and hope you keep reading!

A Rare Gift

After grabbing cash and changing into some less scorched clothes, thanks to his distracting thoughts that morning at the boardwalk he now walked along the brick streets of downtown with Nepeta Leijon. On his best behavior Gamzee hadn't dared to pull out a single light while with her. He had tried his best to avoid calling her a motherfucker and was working his best to be the best gentleman he could possibly be while with her.

To be honest, he wasn't used to this Nepeta. Sure she was still the same feline loving gal who he had grown so close to with her bubbly personality and funny cat puns, but somewhere along the way she had found the ability to send butterflies into his stomach every time she laughed with her chin tilting back slightly and her soft curly hair blowing in the breeze. At some point in their time away from one another she had still managed to find a way into the depths of his heart.

Pulled back from his train of thought with the gentle brush of Nep's fingers to his he jumped slightly and looked at her. She blushed softly and looked away about to pull her fingers back from his before Gamzee slipped his fingers between hers holding her close. Biting her lip she blushed once more and looked away giggling softly as he gently swung their hands.

The evening had been lovely. More than he could even ask for after a showing at the theater and a walk down to the cafe. Nepeta had wanted to see some love movie, of course, and Gamzee had voted for a zombie flick that was probably just as B rated. Finally they had made an agreement to see both and ended up not leaving the theater till ten that night. They had gone through two large bowls of popcorn and almost a pound of Twizzler string candy which, the two of them had ended up fighting with like a set of broken swords.

Walking into the cafe arm in arm laughing as Gamzee reenacted some of the ridiculous movie scenes from the movies they had spent all day watching grasping a few glances from the people around them.

Gamzee grinned stepping back a step to look at the menu before leaning against the counter top and grinning as he spoke to the hipster himself, Eridan Ampora, behind the counter with a fowl look on his face at having to serve the ridiculous pair, "Oh hey there motherfucker when did you start working here?"

With a sneer Eridan replied snidely trying his best not to roll his eyes, "What do you fuckin want Makara?"

"Hmm... do you have any miraculous lemonade?"

"Wha..." Eridan's sneer disappeared replaced by confusion until he was looking at Gamzee incredulously. "Are you fuckin serious? This is a coffee shop you idiot."

Nepeta standing only a bit behind Gamzee tried her best to not burst into a fit of giggles as Gamzee stepped back with one hand on his hip and the other placing a index finger to his lips, "Well I guess thats a no. Shit man I was really wanted some of that wicked elixer! Huh, how about Faygo? That stuffs the shit you gotta be havin some of that right motherfucker?"

"Oh my fuckin cod order somthing on the menu or the glubbin hell out of here clown."

Laughing good humoredly Gamzee waved his hand and put his arm around Nepeta lazily, "Okay okay calm your shit man. Whatever the lady wants and I'm not really to thirsty."

Eridan's eyes widened as his draw dropped slightly at the same moment. "Are you fuckin serious? You just glubbin wasted my time for nothing man? I have other costumers to deal with Makara!"

Gamzee's eyes widened before he looked behind him and around him slowly taking in the vaccant line behind him before he leaned in and whispered, "Yo, dude. Chill the fuck out man. And maybe get your eyes checked while your at it."

Eridan looked like someone had just dropped a boulder on his toe as he went red in the face gritting his teeth into a forced smile before the blond shook his head and turned his attention to a smiling Nepeta. "What do you want Leijon?"

"Umm..." Nepeta bit her lip before tapping her chin. "I'll take a latte with extra foam please."

Rolling his eyes Ampora pushed up his glasses before turning around and working the machines to fill out the order. After about two minutes he returned, taking the juggalo's cash and handing the beverage to Nepeta before casting a dark glare to Gamzee as the two walked out and headed back to the Leijon household.

Sipping on her coffee and holding it close to her chest Gamzee's eyes did their best not to look as the evening chill settled in on the town. The cool breeze from the ocean could be felt, brushing their skin and sending goose bumps across their flesh as they linked hands once more speaking softly.

"So, how's the artwork been going sense I last saw you?" Nepeta asked looking up at him with sparkling eyes as she finally asked the question she had been timid to ask for so long.

That question though stopped him in his tracks though. After a moment he shook his head and moved his feet once more though, "Well, I haven't really done any art sense... Well sense... You know..." He spoke the last parts quietly, the harsh pain in his head beginning to prod his mind.

"Oh. That's too bad." Nepeta spoke timidly before sipping her coffee again. "I always used to love looking at your art work."

That got him thinking.

After a while though Gamzee and Nepeta arrived back at the porch steps of her house. Nepeta bounced on her toes before sipping her coffee for one last drink before turning to look at Gamzee after doing so.

Across Nepeta's upper lip she had collected a milk foam mustache making him laugh and her eyes widen in question. "What is it?"

"You got a bit uh," he laughed pointing to his upper lip before shaking his head and leaning in. Gamzee's arms wrapped around Nepeta's waist as his head bent down and their lips touched, his tongue slowly traced the milk foam making a burning heat rise in her cheeks as the coffee cup slipped from her hands and onto the floor.

Slowly he pushed her back until her spine touched the brick wall as their lips crashed and her fingers slid into his hair. Her little nails slid down his neck and spine, making him shiver as she gasped against his kiss, a soft sound, almost a purr escaping her throat that brought forward a soft chuckle from Gamzee as he pulled away just a bit and whispered breathlessly, "I should go home."

"Um," Nepeta, blushing like a fool nodded while biting her lip. "Purrobably…"

With a smile Gamzee's lips touched the kitten's brow before his arms slipped away from her and he began stepping back down the sidewalk towards the way back home. "Goodnight Nepeta."

With a small wave and a hammering heart Nepeta gave a timid wave, "Goodnight Gamzee…"

That night, stepping down the cemented path towards his own abode Gamzee Makara could not wipe the unpainted grin from his face. For once he felt no pain or paranoia. For once he felt no fear or anger. For once, death did not knock at the doors to his memories. "Motherfuckin miracles…" Gamzee Makara muttered as he fell back into the couches embrace closing his eyes and falling into a peaceful sleep.

For once, Gamzee Makara was happy.


	8. All Messed Up Inside

Author's Note:

Hey everyone! Thank you for your reviews once again because I love hearing opinions on this stuff because it encourages me to write more. From what I've seen you all are enjoying the story so far and I'm so happy to hear that.

For this chapter I won't be including Gamzee this time because I think it'd be nice to dip into Nepeta a bit more and understand how she's feeling about everything as well as have a way to pull back up some foreshadowing I placed earlier in the story. And before you ask no I do not hate Vriska she just makes a great "bad guy" for this story.

Recently I have also posted up the first chapter of my Black Butler via Undertaker fanfiction so if any of you are fellow fans please let me know how I'm holding up.

Another thing I feel you all should know is that I am working on personal stuff for a manuscript competition so I may be a bit off in my updating. I will be updating a lot this weekend I do hope but with the 4th of July coming up startling soon I think you should all know that I will be out of town and unable to update for at least two weeks.

So I will be crazy updating until and after then.

Hope you all like the new chapter and thank you for taking the time to read my work.

Shout Outs:

roosewe: Goodness gracious everyone keeps mentioning the fact that they love how I write Gamzee haha! I thank you for the compliments but to be honest I'm not quite sure what I am doing different from others. Thank goodness! I'm glad someone thinks she's right because one of my biggest fears when posting a new story or chapter with new characters is that the way I write does not fit the character itself. I'm glad you're enjoying the story and I will do my best to keep updating.

flyingkitties20: Once again for the longest time neither did I! I can't seem to ship them this way in actual Homestuck but I'm a huge humanstuck Leijon/Makara shipper, perhaps you will join the club and I'm glad to get you to consider this ship. Glad you think it's adorable!

All Messed Up Inside

Equius and Nepeta sat across from one another at the same café that only three days ago Nepeta and Gamzee had been in together. For the past three days though Nepeta had not received a single word from the Makara boy and it was beginning to trouble her. Had she down something wrong that night on her porch? Should she have set clearer boundaries or perhaps she had too many. She swallowed quietly as she ran her fingertip around the rim of her coffee cup as her face turned long at the thought of not speaking to him again.

"Nepeta are you even listening to me?" Equius complained pulling her attention back to his lecture as her eyes focused on her closest friend.

She had told him everything that had happened after two days of silence from the juggalo and now the long haired English boy sat across the table from her dissecting the issue at hand with ill contempt. "I am not trying to be rude Nepeta but you and I know he is neither good for you or in your location of class. He's a trouble maker and the only reason I personal associate with the fool is because his family practically owns half this town."

Frowning she pouted slightly before softly speaking, "He's not a furrool Equius... You don't know him like I do."

"I understand you both have a past together but in my opinion it should stay there in the past." Equius sighed lifting his black milk drowned coffee to his lips and swallowing grimly. "I spoke to Aradia again last night." Looking down he scraped at the table with his fingernail. "She said she wants nothing to do with me."

"Oh Equius I'm so sorry. I was just starting to get used to the idea of shipping you two. Purrhaps if you hadn't always been playing those tricks on her though you would not have this purroblem."

"I can't help it Nepeta she's so enticing and you know I am just plainly socially awkward. I never know how to act around her and always end up resorting to childish pranks."

Sighing softly Nepeta placed her hand on Equius's hand about to speak the most comforting words she could find when the door to the shop chimed opening up followed by a matching set of annoying laughter making the hairs on the back of her neck stick up and Equius's eyes dart to the door.

"Oh my gosh it was soooooooo hilarious when he said that! I thought you two would never start dating with him having that obsessive cat girl trailing behind him all the time!"

"I know I was starting to think perhaps I should consider making a move on the cool kid when he finally spoke up!"

Nepeta's nails dug into the table as Terezi and Vriska continued to speak behind her making her glad that for once she hadn't decided to wear her kitten hat that so many people recognized. Their laughter and talk finally seemed to subside and Nepeta began to relax until suddenly Vriska's thin fingered hand dug into her shoulder.

"Nepeta we didn't realize you were here!"

Tensing up once more Nepeta rigidly turned to look at the pair, Terezi giving her unseeing smile and Vriska grinning wickedly as usual. "So, are the rumors true kitty?"

Slightly confused Nepeta began to play with the hem of her shorts before speaking in her clear soprano voice, "What rumors Vriska?"

"That you got down with the clown last Friday night of course!"

That caused a flush of Nepeta's cheeks as well as a cackle from Terezi and the sound of a chair scraping against the tiled floor as Equius tensed up.

"We went out yes…" Nepeta treaded each word carefully as to not give Vriska any weapon against her.

"Oh hunny I already heard all about it! You two were practically stripping down in public though I must say that's not like you at all. Then again though you know how those Makara boys can be…"

Quietly for once Terezi snickered as Nepeta's face burned with embarrassment, "We did not!"

"You didn't? Well I heard differently but trust me if you keep whoring around like that you will be very soon!"

Equius pushed back his chair then standing up and pushing Vriska back. "You shut your mouth and stays away from her hear me?"

After pushing the laughing spider bitch back Equius helped an emotionally traumatized Nepeta up from her chair ushering her out the door before the tears could spill from Vriska's low insults.


	9. Painful Painting

Author's Note:

So, with this chapter I thought it was about time to reveal some more of Gamzee's past foreshadow to future problems ahead of him. We'll be stepping back a few days from Nepeta and discussing a bit of what's been going on with Gamzee for the past three days.

Also, the art work that inspired Gamzee's own art work can be found under the name Pixie Cold. She is a water color painter that is fantastic and may help you to understand what Gamzee's own artwork looks like.

Hope you guys enjoy and thank you for reading!

Shout Outs:

roosewe: Thank you once again! Here's a bit more to understand Vriska a bit better as well as what's been going on with Gamzee. Hope you like it!

Painful Painting

It had been two days sense Gamzee's lips had touched Nepeta's. He sighed softly before turning down the music from his iPod that was currently blaring off the song "Intensities in Ten Cities" before stepping back from the canvas to look at his work. On the canvas lay a perfect match to the face of Nepeta Leijon in a colorful match of watercolor paints dripping down in perfect synchronization.

He sighed blissfully about to dip his fingers into the paint once more before there was a barging knock at the door to his workshop. He frowned surprised that anyone would have found him back here after all sense he hadn't been back here for two years.

"Yo hold up a minute motherfucker." He called before walking over to the door and sliding it open only to freeze in place. Vriska Serket stood there with her hands on her hip nostrils flaring as she glared him down before walking in without a word. Vriska sat down pushing a few things out of her way before crossing her legs.

"What are you motherfucking up and doing here spider bitch? You said you were out." he muttered closing the door once more before slowly walking over to her crossing his arms over his chest.

Ten years ago Vriska Serket's mother had made an unlucky gamble. She had ended up losing everything to the Makara family and eventually the price had been too high for her to pay. The Serkets had lost everything, and would have lost her life if not for her daughter. Vriska had been offered to the Makara's as a way to pay her debt off. By giving her daughter to them their son would receive a worthy marriage and bloodline to pass on.

Although, in the end it was always Vriska's choice.

"I had a meltdown. Nothing more." Vriska somehow managed to loop her finger through the belt of Gamzee's jeans pulling him over. He frowned in irritation but said nothing as he stood there with his side to her.

"I started seeing someone Vriska."

"Oh? Well I'm seeing John just like you said yet that doesn't seem to be a problem." Vriska's fingers began to ebb towards the button of Gamzee's jeans making his skin crawl as he grabbed her wrist pushing them away. He looked up with dark eyes as his mouth turned into a firm line.

"Cut it out. I mean it. I really motherfuckin like Nepeta and you need to cut the crap. We're done. Now get out."

"Nepeta? Leijon? You can't be serious Gamzee what would a cute little thing like her ever see in you?" She asked blinking in surprise and mild shock before going in again.

This time Gamzee grabbed her wrist a bit more firmly and pushed her toward and out the door feeling his anger ebb at the doors of his mind like a crashing wave. "Get out." Without another word the Capricorn slammed the door shut in the Scorpios face before turning his music up louder to drown the sudden anger growing within him.


	10. Furious Feline

Author's Note:

So for this chapter I thought it'd be a bit more fun to take it into Nepeta's point of view via third person view even though this is still Gamzee's story. I had a lot of fun with this chapter and am excited for the next upcoming chapter. Also the inspiration for the beginning of this scene actually came from another fanfiction about Meulin and Kurloz. Small world. It's called _You only have Nine Lives_ and is rather wonderful.

Oh! Did you guys notice? The chapters are getting bigger. :33 Yay!

There are a few things I'd like to address for this chapter though before you all begin.

Now that you all have had the chance to understand why Vriska is such an important character to the story I am happy to say that her presence will be back soon.

I'd also like you all to keep in mind for this chapter that Nepeta has known Gamzee for a long time. He is NOT some random guy she just started dating.

I'm glad you all enjoyed the dipping into Nepeta's point of view as much as I did. It won't be as common throughout the rest of the story though so enjoy it while you can.

Anywho. Last thing is that for the next chapter drugs and sex are going to be playing a bigger part than they have so subtly played recently. So if you're not comfortable with that feel free to skip the chapter because it will be more fluff than important foreshadowing for later. Though if you want to see some character development from Vriska please read the first section.

Lastly I hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I did!

Shout Outs:

flyingkitties20: Yes I will be showing their relationship more closely and I'm glad you asked. She actually is probably going to get her own chapter just to give everyone a bit more of an insight on her character development.

Furious Feline

Sadly Nepeta had run into Vriska once more quickly after the first encounter the other day. Vriska had been alone this time and her words where torturing Nepeta as she slowly walked the streets with no place in mind particularly to go.

"_I'm so sorry Nepeta what I said earlier was horrible of me. Friends?"_

"_We were nevfur-"_

"_Oh hush don't be silly. Anyways I'm just concerned for you Nepeta that's all. Makara, he can be such a player. I mean, just yesterday he was drunkenly all up on me. Horrible experience, can you imagine? Of course I told him no, so you see I'm just worried about you. I just don't you to be the next victim to his devices. You are no one's whore after all…..riiiiiiiight?"_

"I'm not a whore…" Nepeta muttered softly as she finally looked up to where her feet had brought her. Gamzee's house. Of course.

Suddenly an unusual anger filled little Nep's body. Her nostrils flared at the thought of Gamzee using her like some toy he could throw away at any time. She cringed at the thought of his fingers pawing at Vriska. And she fumed at the thought that this fucker had dared to play her like this.

Nepeta Leijon was very, very angry.

Without a further thought Nepeta Leijon pushed through the front door that was surprisingly open. Her hair that over the years had grown down to the middle of her back trailed after her as she stormed from classic room to classic room that was littered with Faygo bottles, vodka bottles, pill bottles, and the reeking stench of marijuana.

"Gamzee! You get out here right now so I can sink my claws into you!"

Nepeta hissed not finding him in the area of the house before the sound of distant music made her ear twitch. Quickly the feline rushed to the exit to the back her body swiftly weaving past the oversized pool, the courtyard, and through the gardens until she reached the shop now covered in over grown foliage and practically pulsating with Eminem.

Her thin fingers curled around the handle of the shop before she pulled it open with surprising strength to reveal a stumbling extremely underdressed Gamzee surrounded by spilled paints. Nepeta didn't think, without a single thought she grabbed the nearest object, being a handheld pencil sharpener before chunking it at the overly high-blood's head.

Upon impact to his head the case popped open spilling pencil shavings into his unruly black hair. Already Nepeta was grabbing the next object as Gamzee cried out, "Motherfucker!" falling back and landing on one of his random horns causing a loud HONK to fill the room as Nepeta threw an eraser at him next going for a tin can filled with paint brushes.

"What the fuck!" Gamzee cried out dodging what his fuzzy mind could manage to. "Nepeta! Fuckin stop!"

"I am not your whore!" She cried out before going to grab another weapon.

Gamzee had caught the drift by now though and quickly rose to his feet grabbing her wrists to keep from getting hit by another set of art supplies, "I never said you motherfuckin were ninjet! Stop it! NEPETA FUCKING STOP!"

That got her to quit. Gamzee held Nepeta's wrists at bay pinned against the brick wall of the shop with an empty Faygo bottle in hand that she slowly dropped to the floor at the feeling of Gamzee's hips touching hers, his bare chest on hers, and his fingers about her wrists. "Are you okay now yo?"

Nepeta blushing slightly looked up at the boy with shavings in his hair and a concerned look in his eyes. Despite the drunken touch, she was beginning to think that perhaps she had been wrong to come in with guns blazing.

"Jeez ninjet," he started wile finally letting her go and bending over to shake the pencil shavings from his hair, "What the fuck was that about?"

"Did you try to sleep with Vriska?" Nepeta flushed after blurting out the incriminating question that made Gamzee's head snap up and his eyes narrow. "Vriska said you tried to sleep with her yesterday."

"And you believed that?" He snapped back now looking rather annoyed before taking a cigarette from the pack laying on the table and lighting it up. He frowned taking a drag as he looked at her.

"You didn't answer my question." She frowned beginning to feel foolish. The fact Gamzee wore nothing but a pair of deep indigo boxers was also becoming rather…distracting.

"No I didn't motherfucking try to sleep with her Nepeta." He pinched the bridge of his nose already feeling a bad headache coming on.

"Have you slept with her?"

"Yes." Gamzee looked up at her plainly before taking another inhale and shaking his head, "You know Nepeta I thought I knew you better. I don't know what all she said to you but if you're seriously going to take her shit over what I say then maybe this isn't a good relationship after all."

"What do you mean "knew me better"?" Nep asked crossing her arms over her chest as she fell into a defensive stance.

Frowning with irritation Gamzee slowly walked towards her as he spoke, "I mean that the Nepeta I know would never motherfucking trust a word that came out of that spider bitch's mouth. I mean that the beautiful, smart, and funny Nepeta I know would never, and I mean motherfucking never let someone else's bitter words undermine her."

By the time he finished speaking their faces were close once more as he looked down at her frowning. "Now can I kiss you now or are you not done throwing shit at my head?"

Nepeta blushed before wrapping her arms around him and nuzzling his chest becoming her usual kittenish self once more. "Oh god I'm so sorry I don't know what got into me…"

"It's okay." He muttered holding her as he smothered out hit cigarette butt and licked his painted lips. "Sorry I didn't call. I was going to a couple days ago cause I wanted to show you something but things got rough…"

"May I see it now?" She looked up at him with big child-like eyes at the thought of a present.

Chuckling the juggalo nodded, "Yeah, sure. I'm motherfucking down with that." Taking the feline's hand he pulled her over to one of the covered muses before pulling off the white sheet to reveal the ten by twelve watercolor portrait of Nepeta laughing.

Inhaling sharply with surprise Nepeta's wide eyes quickly tried to take it all in "Oh my gosh Gamzee this is amazing!"

"Heh." Gamzee shrugged slipping his arms around her waist as the pain from earlier seemed to slowly fade. "It took a while to remember how to use some techniques but I finally got it down again."

"_He did this fur me?"_ Nepeta thought as he fingertips brushed over the piece in fascination before she registered his arms about her waist making butterflies flutter in her stomach as she bit her lip thinking silently only to have her thoughts interrupted once more by the tantalizing sensation of Gamzee's lips on the curve of her neck slowly making a trail from her shoulder to just behind her ear as he breathed a sigh of pure bliss creating a rather warm sensation in the pit of her stomach.

"Are you busy tonight?" She asked gasping a bit as her fingers went back to his hair curling around his locks as she bit her lip harder and thought to herself. She could practically hear her little devil and angel cat fighting it out on her shoulders.

"_Are you crazy?!"Cried out the angelic kitten on her left shoulder while adjusting its halo, "He's a drunk! A druggy! Just like his big brother! Vriska was purrobably right about one thing! Gamzee is a total player! Your just asking to get your heart broke by a classic case of bad boy!"_

_ "Oooh!" Purred the devil kitty dressed in black as her tail curled around her pitchfork, "You know you want to play Nepeta and would it be such a big deal to be a baaad kitty for one night?" _

Biting her lip harder she couldn't help the small mew that escaped her lips as Gamzee tugged on her ear with his teeth.

_"Fur crying out loud he's drunk right now!" hissed the white kitten while trying to bat her hand at Gamzee's face, "Shoo!"_

_ "Oh yeah!" Purred the second as she stretched out on Nepeta's shoulder, "Right there baby! Bring my inner huntress out…"_

_ "Oh god…" _Nepeta thought before shooing away the two kittens on her shoulders.

Gamzee made a soft sound of thinking bringing her back to reality, "I'm not sure. What's today again?"

"Monday…" Nepeta managed to say while biting her lip as his lips pulled away and his chin rested on her head.

"I have a show scheduled this evening. But I'll be free after that."

"Can I go with you?" Nepeta inquired carefully.

"Sure but what did you want to do afterwards?"

"Um, I was wondering if I could stay the night. Sense my mom's out of town and all… it gets kinda lonely you know…"

Gamzee's painted lips pulled down slightly. His face paint hadn't been redone in a few days now and so it was kind of a humorous sight as he considered before softly speaking as his drugged mind slowly began to gather what he thought she was possibly requesting, "You sure you want to?"

After a moment Nepeta nodded. "Yes."


	11. Safe House

Author's Notes:

Hey there everyone! First off I would like to apologize for the belated update. I got ill once again over the weekend and just this morning was able to finish up the chapter.

Second off who's looking forward to some long awaited smut? I know I am! Once again though if you are not comfortable with that or the use of drugs please skip at least the second section of the chapter because if I receive inbox complaints you're only going to get one response… "I warned you about the smut bro! I told you dog!"

Great news by the way guys! Apparently my fics are starting to get noticed! Who would have thunk it?

Anyway, not much to say about this chapter so I'll keep it simple, we will be jerking some feels in the beginning, we'll see a bit more about Vriska, and the rest is purely some fun fluff before we get to the juicy part.

Lastly I have to say you guys are some of the best readers ever! :33 I have been scared to show my original and non-original writings for a long time but after your positive and constructive feedback via inbox and review I am seriously considering sending in my personal work to the local publishing company. Also, the other day I could not get over how kawaii you all are so I gushed on tumblr about how much I love you guys haha! .

You guys ready? Hope you enjoy!

Shout Outs:

roosewe: Well I have been building up to a climax in the story for a while now but after some discussion with my fellow writer who helps me write _You're A Star In Nobody's Eyes But Mine _I felt that it was about time we start diving in deeper! (To be quite honest with you no roosewe I have never seen that anime but I would love to check it out. At the current moment I am staying up till 3 am to get through Death Note though and going to work at nine so I will have to bite through that one first.) Hope you enjoy the update today as much as I did!

Safe House

Later in the day Gamzee Makara stood before the mirror to the guest bedroom inspecting his face. He had quickly called their normal house cleaning service after Nepeta had left and had had immediate response. The house had been cleaned top to bottom in the matter of a few hours and now he stood inspecting himself carefully before turning on the faucet and bending down to splash his face with water rubbing each speck of paint off his face.

Looking up only momentarily he didn't bother to dwell on the face that would stare back at him before turning on the shower head. The room filled with steam rather quickly before Gamzee stripped down and stepped in. His hands stayed on the wall before him as water pounded out the knots I his back creating a sigh of relief from his dripping lips. Shaking his head like a mutt Gamzee worked a handful of shampoo into his palm before working it into his scalp slowly drifting off into the recesses of his mind…

_"Hey little man what's up huh?" Kurloz's hands signed as Gamzee remembered his brother walking over to him and musing his hair so long ago. _

_ "I'm making motherfucking pie man! It's the shit!"_

_ Kurloz grinned crossing his arms over his chest as he looked around the pastry splattered kitchen before signing, "Do I get to taste?"_

_ Gamzee grinned at Kurloz's question before signing back, "Course bro! Take a seat down and taste the miracles!"_

The pie had been a mix up of tapioca and lime pudding on a gram cracker crust with whip cream frosting that the two brothers had given the name "sopor slime pie" to. Shaking his head as soapy suds ran down his skin he swallowed muttering softly before another set of memories flooded his brain, "I miss you bro…"

_"Vriska… Vriska motherfucking stop!" Gamzee pulled his knees up to his chest and looked away from the Scorpio who sat across from him on the couch. _

_ He could still hear his father in the other room mumbling softly to one of his clientele. His mother walked in looking at the two before setting down a plate of milk and cookies. "Is everything okay?"_

_ "Of course Mrs. Makara, Gamzee and I are just getting better acquainted!" fourteen year old Vriska said before watching his mother leave. _

_ She turned her head back to Gamzee before scooting over to him and playing with his hair. Gamzee flinched trying to pull away once more. He was terrified of her. He couldn't help it. Very few people touched a Makara and any sign of affection wasn't normal to him._

He sighed closing his eyes before working conditioner through his hair as he let another memory flood over him like the water running down his spine.

_"I don't get it Vriska, why can't people know what we are if you're going to keep acting like this?"_

_ The Scorpio paused looking at Gamzee with confusion before shaking her head and lowering her voice, "Oh please Gamzee you didn't think I actually like you did you? I'm only agreeing to this to keep my mom safe. I'll do whatever it takes to keep her alive but remember when we get back to school I'll act like none of this ever happened so if you say a word the only fool will be you."_

"Yeah yeah yeah…" muttered Gamzee under his breath as he watched the last of his grime and filth flood down the drain…

Two hours later Gamzee was clean shaven, painted, and shoving a set of pills into his mouth on the beach coast as the crowd flocked in. A ring of his phone buzzed off alerting him that he received a text. Pulling the phone from his pocket he opened up the message with a frown.

TT: _uH, HEY_

TT: _aRE YOU MAD AT ME?_

TT: _wE HAVEN'T SPOKEN IN A LONG TIME._

Shaking his head the juggalo slipped the phone back into his pocket before chewing on his cheek. A lot of his messages, the few ones he had that is, had been like that lately full of questions if he was angry or okay and eventually they all cease. _Let's be fucking honest with ourselves Gamzee you mean the two sets of messages from Karkat and Tavbro have been that way. You and I both know for a fact that Vriska is right. No one gives to shits about us._

"You." He muttered under his breath for the voice inside his head alone, "You mean you. There is no "us". And Nepeta cares. Nepeta cares about me."

_Oh shut up. You would be nothing without me Gamzee and you know that. Sure she cares but didn't Kurloz care too? And yet where is he now? Oh that's right, dead. Because he sure did care enough to stick around-_

"Shut the fuck up and get out of my head!" He hissed a bit too loudly causing some glances in his direction before he clenched his fists to his sides and waited. And waited. But for once, the little voice in his head said nothing.

"Gamzee?" Nepeta asked as a hand touched his arm making him spin around with wide frightened eyes. Slowly though it dawned on him that the girl in her deep green shorts and white blouse was nothing more than that.

"Oh, hey ninjet." He said placing a grin on his lips before leaning in and kissing her cheek.

"So," Nepeta began clasping her hands in front of her. The kitten wore a soft green sundress and sandals as well as matching headband pushing the hair back from her face. "Where's the best seat in the house?"

Giving his best grin besides the painted one he always adorned he pointed to a spot at the corner foot of the "stage" were the view would be easy from the growing crowds of people. Giving a small wave with her fingers Nepeta rushed over to the spot where he had suggested grinning happily as the show begun.

The show was much like any other show he performed full of laughter, awe, and a lot of fire. By the end of the night after the show was over, a few lame carnival games had been played, and Nepeta's craving for cotton candy had been sedated, the two walked arm and arm back to Gamzee's old motor bike.

The bike itself had originally been Kurloz's, but after the brothers death most of his things had been thrown out, the bike being one of the few things Gamzee had been able to save from the junk yard.

Now, it was about eleven in the afternoon and the pair lay back reclined on his couch with Nepeta in his arms. His lips pressed to the curve of her neck as she shook nervously in his arms flushing with a new burning heat as her fingers curled in his raven hair.

Gamzee's fingertips pressed against her hip as the other hand slowly smoothed over her inner thigh back and forth in a soothing motion that brushed the heat beneath her skirts. Her fingers tugged a bit too tight though making him stop with a grunt and pull back with a lick of his lips. "You sure you want to do this? You seem really nervous…"

Nepeta nodded and bit her lip, "Yes, I'm pawsitive it's just, maybe we should do something to calm me down first?"

Author's Note: Alright guys, drugs and lemon begin here so please exit the screen if you're not up for that.

Gamzee frowned slipping his hands from her waist and thigh as he thought, thinking of what he could do before grinning and beaming up at her. "Have you done THC yet babe?"

Poor Nepeta couldn't help it but her eyes widened slightly as she stuttered back in reply, "Pot?"

Chuckling softly Gamzee shook his head before answering, "I'll take that as a motherfucking no. Look you don't have to okay? But it might help your nerves if you'd like to give it a go."

_No. Absolutely not._

Hissed the angel on her shoulder who at this point sat with her arms and legs crossed in anger while the little devil on the other laid back lazily with her tail swaying back and forth slowly. She licked her lips looking up at Gamzee hazily and practically purred.

_What's so bad about popping two cherries in one night hmmm? _

Gamzee watched her conflicted emotions run across her face before he finally began to pull away kissing her lips gently, "Seriously babe its fine we don't have to do this."

Shaking her head quickly Nepeta grasped Gamzee's wrist pulling him back and looking at him with one sure emotion on her face, need. "I want to do this Gamzee."

"Okay Nepeta…" he answered softly after a moment before slipping off the couch and heading into the kitchen.

When Gamzee returned he held a small packet of dried leaves, a lighter, and a makeshift "pipe". The glass tube held a small aluminum foil bowl which Gamzee carefully filled a pinch of weed into before taking the lighter and holding them in each hand. Nepeta watched his hands move gracefully and it was clear to anyone that he had done this many times. Looking up at her held the tube to his lips before lighting the plant within the bowl and inhaling deeply as an example. He grinned still holding the smoke within his mouth before exhaling through his nose like a dragon.

Nepeta sat across from him with large orbs of deep green in slight awe and slight terror. Licking her lips she watched as he carefully touched the pipe to her lips next while lighting the bowl, "Inhale." He spoke softly watching with half lidded eyes as Nepeta took a large inhale before pulling the drug away. "Hold it in ninjet." He muttered softly as his fingertip brushed over her lips.

"Exhale." He spoke softly after a moment followed by the sound of Nepeta releasing through her mouth.

Grinning a bit looser now she giggled before whispering, "That wasn't so bad…"

He chuckled before repeating the process once more to his own lips, this time motioning Nepeta over with his fingertip. She giggled softly before scooting over to Gamzee's lap. The Capricorn's lips suddenly touched hers before the kitten gasped softly feeling his tongue slide over her lips followed by the breath of smoke shotgunning into her own mouth followed by a large puff from both of their nostrils as the two faded into a cloud of lucid smoke.

Gamzee's fingers pressed into Nepeta's stomach pushing her back and down against the couch as his painted lips pressed more urgently to hers. His fingertips of one hand dug into her hip as the other hand slid down her thigh beneath the hem of her skirt and towards the thin scrap separating them both. His lips moved down her jawline and towards her neck as her own fingers slid under the backside of his shirt allowing her nails to scratch at his skin. The feline mewed softly as his teeth scraped her soft skin causing goose bumps to rise across her flesh.

Nepeta slowly pulled away as Gamzee looked down at her with half lidded eyes before her fingertip slowly brushed over his painted lips, "I can't remember the last time I saw you without your makeup on…" She whispered softly before giggling and biting her lip.

He smiled before kissing her cheek and murmuring a, "Be right back…" And slipping off the couch to run into the bathroom with a stupid grin on his face.

Makara spent a good thirty minutes in the bathroom, removing each trace of black and white paints from his skin. When he was done, one look at him would have shocked most. Beneath the contrary colors revealed a sharp jawline of perfect ivory skin compared to Nepeta's flawless yet olive toned color. His thick black hair clung to his damp face in some places created a softer look in his ebony eyes and across his nose was a splash of freckles making him look incredibly young.

Biting his lip he pushed his fingers back through his hair taking one more moment to think.

_What if I'm not good enough for her? _

_What if she hates how I look underneath all this? _

_What if she doesn't love me too?_

Closing his eyes he let a sharp breath escape his nostrils. The truth was, Gamzee Makara was scared of being used once more. Sure he had messed around with Vriska and at first he had thought she had cared or perhaps could have one day, but in all reality he had never cared about many people because every time he had, they had always managed to disappear when he needed them most…

A sound from the living room drew his attention back as he blew a breath out from his unpainted lips before opening his eyes and heading back in. Nepeta had laid waiting upon the couch just as before, curled up to the blankets now though.

He grinned before carefully tiptoeing over to the couch about to leap over and attack her with kisses, only to be frozen by the sound of his kitten snoring softly. Nepeta Leijon had fallen asleep in her lover's absence. He laughed softly before tucking the blankets around her before carefully sliding himself in alongside her. Nepeta, just as in conscious state was beautiful in sleep.  
Her thick black hair curled unruly around her heart shaped face, her long black lashes brushed her olive cheeks, and her dress, now disheveled and disarray, revealed one shoulder from the strap falling. Placing a gentle kiss on her cheek he carefully pushed the strap back up before folding her into his arms and blowing out the candle serving as their light source…

Author's Note:

_**SUCKAS! **_


	12. An Awkward Proposal

Author's Note:

Hi there everyone! I know I've been gone for so long and I'm so sorry about the wait but I just got back from Mexico and recently I've been having some ridiculous relationship issues and stuff with my Kurloz. So, it's been hard for me to pick back up the Makara x Lejion love and I apologize for that.

Anywho, next up is I recently got an inbox complaining about how fast Gamzee and Nepeta move…? So once again I will say that these two have known each other for like… ever? And second, I've been around deaf culture for so long that I think a bit differently, so my Kurloz told me to tell you guys this, "It's different for deafys and those around deaf culture because physical contact and body language are a huge thing for us, so that's why if your friends with someone deaf or mute they probably hug you a lot. Therefore, Nepeta would be used to that kind of culture."

Second is I've been thinking a lot and I may not have a lemon for this story, but if you guys really want one then let me know and I may write a separate piece. (Still keeping it M though because of the content.)

Last of all I know this chapter is really short but think of it as a small pit stop update on the way to the rest of the story.

Hope you all enjoy!

Shout Outs:

flyingkitties20: Yes. I know. The fluff is overwhelming. I considered bringing Tavros into the story for a while but the story its self is about Gamzee becoming mad. True there is some Nepeta romance along the way, but one of the key aspects in a person mentally breaking is commonly the problem of self-isolation. Also, even though Gamzee originally reached out to the other trolls in Homestuck many made fun of him or rejected him. Resulting in the loss of his mind. So, even though I want him to have friends, the truth is only Karkat, Tavros, and Equius were his friends, which did not last long and were all due to fear and blood color in all actuality. Sad but true.

Aka-Chibi: Well hello there stranger! I'm always excited to see a new review! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far and I'm sorry you're not into the drugs and stuff but, A it results in a good drama and B all of the above are actual problems and things that stupid teenagers do so, there it is. Hope you keep reading though and enjoy!

An Awkward Proposal

Gamzee smiled at Nepeta as he laid there on the beach blanket while she sat beside him inspecting his Capricorn tattoo across his forearm. They had chosen to spend the day at the beach together. Despite the fact that Nepeta hated the water she had agreed to go sense Gamzee said he felt most at home there and so as the ocean waves crashed in the background they both enjoyed the sun's kisses on their skin.

When she had asked him to get in though he had disagreed. He liked to watch the wave's crash and tumble mixing together in one fluid power but yet he preferred not to be a part of that mass movement. So instead they just laid there under the sun building sandcastles and watching the tide rise.

As Gamzee intently watched the seagulls fly overhead though, carefully smoking a cigarette as too not blow smoke on her, she brewed her worries over. Gamzee had always been more to himself. At first he had tried to make friends but Nepeta was noticing more and more now his lack of socializing with anyone but herself and this... was beginning to worry her. Nepeta wouldn't tell him but once or twice she had glanced through his messages while he was occupied. Curiosity was a powerful thing after all pushing her over lines she would not normally cross. His texts showed that the last conversation besides between he and her had been sent from over a month now displaying an angered Karkat furious with Gamzee's continuous disappearing.

The last sent message had been to her.

That worried her. It wasn't that she was scared he was obsessed with her, but Nepeta knew just how fragile he could really be...

Gamzee sighed bringing her focus back to him. They had been officially dating for three months now and summer break was coming to a fast and halting end. Nepeta had enrolled to take extra classes through the local University and Gamzee had volunteered to teach free art classes at the community center this year. It would be busy with little time to spend together.

They had had a few rough patches here and there of course like any other couple but most ended in her body crashing against the wall as their lips touched into a rather…steamy turn out. Most of the arguments had been about small petty things that resulted in them calling one another stupid or crazy, and sometimes Nepeta would walk out, make it down to the third house on the block before running back into his arms. Their worst fights though always were about his use of drugs. Finally though he agreed that his use of anything besides weed and cigarettes was out of the question.

"Gamzee..." Nepeta started off quietly as she slipped her tan slender fingers through his pale boney ones. He had been thinking about that night again. The night he and she had... He shook his head with a small smile, best not to dwell on that just yet, before looking up at her.

"Sup kitty-bitch?"

"Why don't we go out with some friends tonight? I think it would be good for us you know... Maybe Sollux and Aradia or purrhaps Karkat and Terezi?"

Gamzee frowned at that. Sure things had gotten much better between Karkat, Terezi, and Nepeta but for some reason Gamzee couldn't find himself willing to forgive Karkat. All it brought back was the sound of Nepeta's broken voice over the phone...

"I don't motherfucking know about that ninjet..." he hesitantly said as he crushed out the butt of his cigarette.

The kitten's arms went around his as she shook him playfully. "Oh come on Gamzee it'll be fun! We can go to that amusement park across the border that you've wanted to go to!"

Gamzee frowned but looking up at Nepeta he was instantly sold. With a small sigh he nodded. "Okay."


	13. Lies

Author's Note:

Hey guys so a few things to be said today. So for those who hadn't noticed I did indeed change my pen name from jadrp101 to MamaMeu and password due to safety issues that the account had before. Apparently someone thought it'd be funny to shoot random and rather rude messages off my account. -_-

Anywho, well I think the new name fits better anyway sense I don't roleplay as Jade anymore and all I do is here is spam your faces with my ships. As a perk I even posted a picture of me and my Meulin horns. :33

Speaking of Meulin, for those who were so supportive about my slow updating last time I just want to say thank you. Kurloz and I appreciate that you guys gave us time to work some things out but to answer some inboxes, no him and I are no longer together. Just friends.

There have been a few projects I have been working on actually sense I am trying to get things ready for the Homestuck meets I will be leading after February. I also am working on selling a lot of my horns for not only Homestuck but things like Black Rock Shooter and Sleeping Beauty. If any of you are following me on tumblr, (my username is mrslichking) then you can receive all the updates on that and some other things soon.

Anyway, so a bit about this chapter now. I heard the prayers for smut and guess what kitties. They have been answered. I must really really love you guys huh? I'm not used to writing such long pieces though say it may be a bit rough and I am so sorry for that. :c I will throw out a lemon warning for those who do not want to read the smut and that is totally acceptable and fine, okay? The only thing I ask is no reporting, okay? That's just uncalled for.

So, sense Karkat and Terezi are in this chapter I do need to say a few more things. I really… don't like Terezi. I don't know why I just can't get myself to like her. Sad really. Them together is pretty much a classic ship but what's wrong with that? I tried my very best to not bash so you guys can feel free to tell me how I did.

After getting through this chapter I know how to continue for the next few chapters so I'm hoping to give another update this afternoon. Finally, have any of you any curiosity as to what my head canon voice for Nepeta is?

Probably not.

But I'm going to throw it out there anyway after seeing a video last night. If you'd like to hear it look up the song Quiet by Lights on the youtube. (LIKEOMFGITSSOPURFECTIMFANGIRLINGGUYS)

Anyway, enough. Onto the shoutouts and story. Enjoy. :33

Shout Outs:

roosewe: I'm glad you like it hun. All relationships have struggles and so I felt that should be shown a bit.

Pinku Matsumoto: You have no idea how hard I laughed when this popped up on my email reminders. It made me smile so much I felt I should answer your wishes.

Jace666: Thank you so much! I really love the Makara line. People really underrate their importance in Homestuck and it irritates me like no other! :c Well, if you want to see where this is going you will have to continue reading I'm afraid, but it does have an ending I assure you. Oh I love my fluff readers. You guys are the best. Mostly cause you're willing to admit that's why you're here. Hope you like the next few chapters then cause they will be fluffy for a bit more.

Lies

Gamzee looked over at Nepeta as they walked up the porch steps to her green front door. The day had been long and turned out rather terrible in all actuality. Nepeta's ideas to turn things around between Karkat and Gamzee had turned out to be rather bad…

Karkat stood beside Terezi with his arms crossed as she sat on the roof of his car casually looking around as if though there was something for her to actually see as Nepeta and Gamzee walked over from two rows back hand in hand. Nepeta of course was already smiling her silly grin as she waved excitedly over at Karkat and Terezi making their way through the rows of vehicles.

A flare of something deep and disturbing flickered within the pit of Gamzee's stomach as he looked at his old friend, the one whom he had trusted, yet had so easily betrayed him in more ways than he could actually comprehend. Perhaps it was the sound of screaming in the background or maybe it was more like the sickening smell of sweet cotton candy that filled his nostrils and overwhelmed his senses.

_That motherfucking little shit. It's his fault. He never really gave two shits about you Gamzee. After all we always where just the little laughing stalk of him and his group of motherfucking friends…_

Shaking the disgusting thought from his mind he looked at the new couple silently. His dark lashes barely touched the tips of his curly hair as he watched silently and followed the small kitten over to them. "Well goddamn douche bag sure did take you fucking long enough."

Nepeta laughed uneasily at Karkat's tone as she glanced warily up at the tall Capricorn who seemed calm enough before looking back to the Cancer. "Well let's go in why don't we?"

It was a bit funny how the pair worked though in all honesty. As Nepeta and Gamzee walked hand in hand Karkat walked ahead of Terezi and she followed shortly behind with her hand on his shoulder, his hand over hers, as he led her through the tangled throngs of people. Now and then Karkat would slow down and glance back at the girl behind him, speaking so only the two of them could hear his soft inquires of if she was okay answered by a shrug and bright grin. Terezi loved the amusement park. Even though she couldn't ride some of the rides and could get easily lost, the overwhelming amounts of smells and sounds amazed her.

Every once in a while Nepeta would catch him doing so though and small pang would twist her heart apart as she watched him do so. She had had time to heal though after all and after observing the couple for a while now, the romantic could tell that he was with the right girl after all. In all their years of dating Nepeta could not remember once when he had looked at her with such gentle eyes, a rare sight to see for sure.

Gamzee seemed to still be in a world of his own though. As the afternoon turned evening he only seemed to grow more distant despite the fact that he stood towering beside her.

After a bit though Karkat seemed to trust Terezi with Nepeta and so the two squealed loudly as they clung tightly to the wheel between them in the ride called the twister spinning in d ever going loops. As the two spun it faster and faster laughing the whole way the two males stood a few feet away gathering a few hamburgers and drinks from a nearby stand.

"I'll take care of it…" Gamzee muttered as he withdrew his wallet from his back pocket and handed over a crumpled wad of cash to the bored looking teenager in pointed sunglasses despite the fact it was growing dark outside.

Karkat was quite for a moment, a rare thing for the younger boy, before speaking out, "Why didn't you fucking text me back? Do you know how worried I was about your reckless ass?"

Hunched over a bit Gamzee frowned and stood up straight exposing just how freakishly tall he was. "Shut the fuck up Karkat. I don't need your motherfucking fake feels right now alright?"

Slightly caught off guard Karkat stammered for a moment before grabbing the drinks and trailing after Gamzee, "What the hell are you talking about? You where my best fucking friend and _you_ are the one who stopped talking to _me_."

Every muscle in Gamzee's body tensed in that moment before he spun around, glancing in the direction of the girls before shoving a finger into Karkat's chest, "I'm not motherfucking stupid. Don't give me that shit. The only reason you're here is because Nepeta and Terezi made you. The last thing you would want to motherfucking do is have a feels jam. So cut the motherfucking shit. The only reason we were "friends" is because I have always been the joke of your little friendship circle. Took me long enough but I guess I finally motherfucking figured it out huh? You never gave a fuck about me…"

It took every ounce of strength for Gamzee to turn away and sit down. The truth was he wasn't mad at Karkat for leaving Nepeta anymore. After all she only had grown stronger. The truth was hurt from the fact that for a moment he had believed Karkat…

Silence only seemed to follow as the two sat their waiting for the girls to come back. Karkat couldn't get the Capricorn's words out of his head. It was clear with just one look into his eyes that something in Gamzee had completely snapped. Gamzee was right after all though. He had never really given a shit about Gamzee. The others and he had simply always taken him as the joke of the group until recently.

"Hey losers!" Terezi called from behind Nepeta as they walked over a bit dizzily but smiling brightly, "What you get us to eat I'm starving…"

Author's Note:

So… lemon warning. Go away if you don't want to read about sex.

"Kitty-bitch…" Gamzee muttered softly once more as his lips brushed against her brow. Sighing softly she curled her fingers into his shirt as he drew her back to reality. His fingers dug slightly into her hip bones his body pressed against hers and pushed them back against the wall and into the shadows of her porch way.

_Purrhaps it's best…_ Nepeta thought to herself as she felt the gentle pressure of his lips travel down and against the curve of her neck before lightly brushing back up and to just behind her earlobe. _You wouldn't like sharing him after all would you…_

Nepeta gasped softly before letting go of a slow purr against his tangled hair as her heart began to pound in her chest. Gamzee's fingers slowly traveled down from her hips and onto her thighs before gripping them slightly and pulling her up so that her legs could wrap around his hips tightly. The back of Nepeta's shirt lifted slightly and she could feel the brick wall biting into her olive flesh as her arms wrapped around his neck and her lips pressed to his.

Perhaps there was one good thing about Gamzee being angry after all. The sex was always great.

Their lips crushed hungrily against one another with the occasional clashing of tongues fighting against one another for dominance in a twisted knot of desire. Soft moans muffled by his mouth mixed with his own grunts of need before she bit his lip. Gamzee's fingers held her thighs tightly but her muscles clenched tightly about him.

"Door… room… now…" Nepeta managed to gasp out against him with lips smudged from grey and white paint.

With a small grunt for an answer Gamzee stepped back while Nepeta clung tightly to every inch of him, even her small fingers knotted tightly in his hair as he clumsily walked them through the door barely managing to close it behind them and make it all the way to her room. As she sat up a bit and began pulling off her shirt Gamzee followed suit as well as using his own shirt to wipe away any remains of makeup he had left.

Managing to slip off all their clothes except their undergarments the two lovers hands immediately went for the other. Gamzee's fingers slid into her hair tugging backwards so that her chin had to tilt up. Her lips parted as the two let out gaspy sounds of a need for air. Purring deeply Nepeta's hands that had managed to land on his surprisingly toned chest, curled and slid down allowing her fingernails to bite into his skin and leave light trails behind him.

Something like a growl escaped his lips before Gamzee let go of her curls and quickly grasped her wrists pining them high above her head. The Capricorn grinned, the light casting off the moon showing his teeth before he dove down and kissed just below the curve of her breast. Silently Gamzee thanked the merciful messiahs for her choice in clothing today that allowed him to unsnap her bra from the front instead of the back. With a pop and a twist the clasp came undone allowing him to nudge the two pieces away.

Nepeta's chest rose and fell deeply as a deep hue filled her cheeks watching him lick his lips at the sight of her rather well-endowed chest. Slowly letting go of her wrists the highblood moved them to either side of her hips before his lips touched her breasts once more. Sighing softly his hot breath tickled her skin and sent chills down her spine before his tongue slowly circled the buds of her breasts.

Giving another shiver for good measure Nepeta's lips parted to moan his name only to mew in surprise as his teeth tugged and pulled a bit making her blush speechlessly. Squirming beneath him he chuckled softly before backing off and touching his lips to hers. As their lips tangled once more in a much slower dance Gamzee worked away her thin panties and tossed them aside only to follow with his boxers away shortly.

Each movement is precise and planed out on Gamzee's accord. After rolling the thin protection over his hard and already throbbing member Gamzee slips Nepeta's wrist above her head once more and slides himself in between her legs. As their lips touch and mingle her legs slowly wrap around his waist allowing him more access to her swollen and burning flower. He groans softly as his hips push forwards and so do hers, allowing him to slip into her.

He grunts after finally managing to bury himself deep within her before his hips begin to move back and forth slowly. Nepeta moans softly beneath him, stretched out and helpless as her walls are stretched tight about his large and overwhelming size. Small noises of pleasure and felicity escape both their lips as Gamzee speeds up and eventually Nepeta joins in as well.

Gasping in greedy gulps of air, the sounds of their bodies crashing against one another and the sounds and musky smells of sex fills the room around them. Nepeta's own nails bite into her palms as she cries out beneath Gamzee. Her back arches and her heat tightens about Gamzee's only making him grunt and go harder until his tip is hitting the entrance of her cervix.

"G-GAMZEE!" She cries out desperately before her body trembles and her ecstasy spills over making her moan loudly.

Gamzee's eyes widen hearing her call out to him like that sends his body overboard and his gut wrenching before he releases with one more good thrust into her, his body buried deep within her own. He licks his lips tasting the salt of his sweat before he slowly lets go of her wrists staring down at her shakily. Her wrists, slightly purple already from his grip flex gently as she stares up at him with lustful eyes and breathes through parted lips.

As his lips trail down her neck Nepeta purrs loud enough for him to hear. "Gamzee…" His eyes close with an immeasurable pleasure at hearing her say his name like that taking away the pain and the ebbing anger of his mind. As the night faded though and the two folded into one another's warm embrace Nepeta could not shake the feeling that something had finally cracked in Gamzee's mind…


	14. Down and Dirty

Author's Note:

Hey guys so, this is actually probably the last comedic chapter I'll be giving you guys for this story. I may have a bit more fluff but I'm not for sure yet. I'm planning to have the next chapter from Vriska's perspective as promised beforehand and then we should only be a few more chapters away from the end. This chapter is… shamefully short compared to yesterdays…

Also I will be writing a short one page fanfic of DavexJade that I've been thinking about, as well as a ZeroxMaya page for those who play BL2.

So my classes start this week and as a leader of anime club at school I have to plan at least a month's worth of activities and ideas for our noisy group to act in this week. I also need to start getting a few online pages ready… (Oklahoma Homestuck Meets, Horns for the Hornless, Friends and Family of the Transgendered…) (OMFG WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF) (Which by the way if you want info on any of those just send me a PM.)

On the bright side I will only be on campus for three hours a day this year and will be home in time for lunch so if I manage work and school properly I should have time to update pretty well. But, with everything coming up this week I will probably not be able to update for at least a week or so.

Anywho, enjoy.

Down and Dirty

Nepeta's eyes fluttered open at the sound of a car door slamming shut, ripping her away from the exotic dreams of a feline mistress on the hunt for her prey none other than a tasty looking goat... It took her a minute but she finally shot up and looked out the window just in time to see Equius walking to her front door. "Shit! Gamzee!" Violently shaking the clown whose long limbs where still tangled about her bare body tightly he shot up as well tumbling off the bed in a tangle of sheets and long limbs. "Equius!" She hissed sharply while tossing his jeans at him and bolting for her robe.

It took only a short moment for Gamzee to find his senses and quickly flop around on the floor desperately trying to pull up his jeans. Equius had not approved of the twos relationship of course but he had bared it after a month or so of being given no choice to do otherwise. Though, Equius would have killed Gamzee if he had known that the two had been sleeping together."Motherfucker…" He muttered as he tried to push his legs into his jeans only to fall over and onto the floor with a thud as Equius entered the main room downstairs.

"Nepeta?! Nepeta was that you?! Are you up?!" He called as he made his way up the hall and towards her door.

"In the closet!" Nepeta hissed before shoving him into the closet and shutting the double doors right as Equius knocked and entered.

As the door cracked open Equius glanced around the room and finally his eyes landed on the robed Nepeta with her back to the closet door. Pushing up his favor shades onto his head he frowned slightly. "Is everything alright? I could have sworn I had heard you speaking to someone else…"

As Nepeta's heart pounded in her chest like a drum she smiled despite the fact that she felt like a mouse caught in a trap, "What? Equius I think you are hearing things."

Inside the cramped closet Gamzee struggled not to move despite the fact he was much too tall for the area about him. His back was bent into an uncomfortable position and his face was shrouded in a mix of Nepeta's clothes. The most challenging part of the whole scenario though was Gamzee's desperate trying to hold back his laughter, resulting in the painful biting o his lower lip.

Her voice, muffled but close spoke just outside the door, "What are you doing here so early?"

Outside Equius frowned and looked around the room once more, slowly drawing out each word, "We have breakfast pla-" Suddenly Equius stopped mid-sentence, his whole body tightening up at the sight of a wadded up black t-shirt stuffed under her bed, but peeking out just enough for him to catch. Rushing over to the material he quickly picked it up and shook it as walked over to her, "What the hell is this?!"

"Uh… That's my… pajama shirt…?" Nepeta responded carefully but knowing all too well they were now doomed.

Equius's eyes narrowed as he clenched the fabric tightly, "It reeks of marijuana and Faygo Nepeta… Where is he?"

His eyes darted over Nepeta before lightly pushing her away from the closet doors and swinging them wide open to reveal a uncomfortable but laughing Gamzee. "Sup bro?"

Equius's nostrils flared and his accent only proceeded to grow heavier. "I ask that you leave the premises NOW sir so that I will not be forced to escort you out personally."

Gamzee just laughed stumbling out of the closet bare foot and shirtless as he gently took the wrinkled material from raging Equius's hands with a chuckle. He glanced at flushing Nepeta before giving her a quick smile, "I think I should head out. I'll text you later." He laughed quickly dodging out the room and outside as Equius finally unfroze and began to scream how he would be doing no such thing and look at how he had tainted the poor innocence.


	15. In Another World

Author's Notes:

Hey guys guess what? I GOT TO UPDATE EVERYTHING! I feel accomplished. ^.^

So this chapter is in the perspective of Vriska as I promised and I hope was a good relay on information as well as an update on things because the fact is I don't hate Vriska and most of my bad guys in the stories I write do have some reasoning to their antagonism. I also tried to incorporate Calliope and Caliborn in this chapter so you can tell me what you guys think.

My new JadexDave headcanon has been posted by the way so you guys can check that one out if you haven't already aka the fic called _Waking._ Also if I have any BL2 fans up in here guess what? Got that one up too. Who's good? I'm good. That one is under the title _We are Us_.

Anyway, hope you enjoy the next few updates of fluff, (literally I think I have two more fluff pieces in the bag for you guys) because after that we will be closing up Fading with maybe one or two last chapters.

Finally I want to thank you guys for your patience and following. It means a lot to me.

ShoutOuts:

Apocalypsebutterfly: Well I'm glad I'm not the only who found that chapter funny. XD

In Another World

Vriska walked down the boardwalk way slowly swinging her hands at her sides as her eyes wandered over the ocean now and then. She had always thought it would have been cool to be a pirate when the Americas had first been discovered, sailing the seven seas and all. A small smile touched the Scorpio's lips. She could still remember when Ampora and she had been small kids chasing one another with foam swords on the deck of his father's yacht.

Things were different now of course though. Ampora and she had slowly grown apart after she had been a complete ass to him in middle school and then he wouldn't let her near him at all in high school. She regretted that she could admit. The truth was she had always had a small crush on the hipster and the way he always seemed to know exactly what he wanted. For as long as she could remember though she had been that way, not able to communicate her feelings in an appropriate manner to others causing her bitchy persona to be rather well known.

Of course things had changed over time, after Tavros in elementary school it had been Ampora and then eventually it had been John Egbert. A small smile touched her lips at the thought of the dorky kid with his prankster ways. John had asked her to go steady with him after their sophomore year and she had never been happier. There was only one problem in it all…

Makara.

She frowned just thinking about his name. His family had ruined her life in all reality not him, but no matter how hard she tried Serket could not seem to get herself to be any less angry with him. His family held a powerful name, and though everyone acted as though no one knew his family was the underground gang of the city everyone pretended his riches came from old money and not illegal activity.

Her mother had a bad habit of gambling yet she usually won. Her mother had lost a large sum of money though, and to pay it back had taken a loan from the Makara family. Unable to pay the debt off though Gamzee's father had personally come to find her and beat the payment out of her. In the end though they had struck a deal sense the Serket family did hold a surprising amount of high standard.

In the end her mother had traded her daughter over for her own life just like any true pirate would.

She closed her eyes and sighed softly. _If I was strong I would call the deal off, but instead I am too scared._

There was one bigger problem now though then even her feelings for Egbert. In the past few months Nepeta and Gamzee had suddnely started dating and seemed to be practically inseparable causing only another conflict for her. She would have to separate them and no matter how much she loved the thought of hurting a Makara the thought didn't settle well in her stomach…

The familiar sound of a deep laughter caught her off guard making her eyes flutter up and around only to land on the beach where Gamzee Makara stood without a shirt and a pair of crumpled jeans. He was talking to a set of twins, one with bright eyes and a lovely smile, the other with his arms over his chest and an annoyed look on his face. The girl and boy seemed to be the exact height with the exact same white blonde hair but from there the alikeness ended.

Vriska didn't seem to even notice that her feet took her down the steps and onto the sandy shore before him. His deep eyes glanced up catching her in sight, his mouth corner tugged down slightly but he quickly focused onto the kids once more. As Vriska neared she began to overhear their conversation.

"I wanna be a performer just like you one day Gamzee! That'd be sooo cool!" The little girls squeaked while clapping excitedly.

Gamzee grinned and laughed a bit before noticing the Scorpio once more this time saying something, "Hey Calliope, Caliborn, this is my friend Vriska. Vriska, these are the twins."

"Oh hi!" Calliope practically bubbled over at the same time as Caliborn gave an ugly sneer and muttered something about him always hanging out with ugly bitches.

Vriska frowned at that last part but did her best to give a smirk to the girl before Gamzee ruffled Calliopes hair and spoke, "Alright, you two motherfuckers best be gettin out of here don't you think?"

Serket watched in fascination as Calliope hugged and waved goodbye before pulling her brother along in tow behind him as the two ran up the sandy beach every now and then Caliborn pushing his sister away. Her eyes slowly flickered over towards Gamzee as she crossed her arms over her chest tightly and questioned, "Sense when do you like kids?"

Shrugging Gamzee made a slight face before speaking carefully, "Kids are motherfucking cool. They're always talking about whatever is on their mind and spoutin ideas that no one ever thinks of."

Surprised by his reaction it took a moment for the spider bitch to speak again, instead her eyes roamed over him, "How are things with you and Nepeta?"

Gamzee's lips tugged into that dreamy smile of his as he laughed as though thinking of some personal joke only his mind knew, "Good. Kitty-bitch and I are motherfucking good."

With a small nod Vriska bit her lip and carefully treaded her next question, "So, I was just curious if you were planning to come to my party this Friday? Sense school will be starting back up and all I thought we should all hang out…"

Frowning, Gamzee gave a small shrug before glancing over in the direction of the crashing waves with quiet contemplation. That was one thing she had never understood about him, about how dangerously attentive he could be for someone who acted so redundant. "Is Nepeta allowed to come?"

A slight flicker of negativity flickered in the pit of Vriska's feelings towards the Leijon. The truth was that she knew without allowing the girl to come that the stoner wouldn't come either. She answered carefully as though the two were playing one big gamble, "Why not?"

In his eyes surprise clearly flickered before he glanced back at Vriska and began gathering his things to head out. When finally done picking up his Faygo and some loose clothing he looked at the Scorpio and shrugged, "We'll try to be there." He gave her a mild wave before walking off and away from her.

Vriska just stared. She watched as his footprints washed away in the tide and hid silhouette faded into nothing more than a speck. Swallowing she looked down at her feet before glancing over at the growing tide as she thought silently to herself.

_Perhaps in another life we could have been something different…_


	16. The Voices in My Head

Author's Note:

Hey guys so, first things first. I will be finishing_ Fading _and _You're a Star in Nobody's Eyes but Mine_ but after that I will be putting away fanfiction for a while. I have a lot of work I need to do on my book sense my new deadline is February. I really appreciate all the support though guys because the fans of my fiction are what have made this book possible.

I'm hoping to come back after I finish it but the thing is sometimes life puts obstacles in your path and you just got to keep moving and work around them. So, that's what I'm doing, cutting out the unnecessary pieces and keeping that which is needed.

Anyway so in this chapter I wanted to bring back some things I had had in the previous chapters, retouch base. The next chapter I post I am planning for it to be the last but there may be two more and then that will be it. Also a fun fact about the next chapter, it actually may be in Nepeta's view again! :o

Enjoy!

Shout Outs:

Apocalypsebutterfly: Really? I felt it was a complete failure for a Vriska haha.

Pinku Matsumoto: Yes yes I did haha. I hope you liked it because I honestly felt like a failure at writing in her perspective even though I felt her story was really important to the overall plot line. Awe! Really?! That's so sweet haha! Well I hope you keep reading and enjoying these last few updates.

These Voices in My Head

Gamzee blinked at the case of pills in his hand that used to rattle around in his pocket. He hadn't taken a single one sense Nepeta and he had gone on two weeks dating. He wasn't sure why really but in the end he could say it was safe to assume that being around her so much had distracted him from other things going on around him. His encounter with Vriska though had brought his reality of life crashing back down and Gamzee was beginning to feel himself cracking all week.

He would need to tell Nepeta about Vriska. It was true that he could have just called the whole ordeal with her family off, but there was nothing about her that he truly hated so much that he could find it in himself to do that. Gamzee withdrew a single pill from the bottle and looked at the white tablet roll across his palm. One wouldn't hurt…

There was also the fact that though he loved Nepeta with all his heart was it really a realistic thought to think that one day they could marry one another? No. It really wasn't… And above all, Gamzee knew in the depths of his heart that she could do so much better than some kid stuck in his cultural boundaries who heard voices in his head whispering and shouting within his eardrums.

_well isn't that fucking sweet._

_GUESS YOU FINALLY MOTHERFUCK UP AND FIGURED IT OUT YOU LITTLE SHIT._

_can't rely on miracles forever brother._

Closing his eyes Gamzee let out a shaky breath before glancing around frantically as if though someone else besides him could be in that barren house. Giving one more paranoid look about the bedroom though Gamzee quickly shoved the pill into his mouth and swallowed before lying back in his bed. The colors began to swim almost immediately and the pain receded even faster. Gamzee gave one of those stoned grins of his before looking over at the poster covered wall and then down at the puppet sitting beside him on the bed. "Hey there motherfucker…" Makara muttered before picking up the doll and lifting it above him. "Sup little motherfucker? Cal you're such a wicked little fucker telling me those secrets like you do…" Gamzee chuckled only to pause and bring the doll a bit closer to listen to his miraculous words.

"Aw man lil bro nah. I could never motherfuck up and forget about you."

"Well… yeah I know I spend a lot of time with her but…"

"Cal no…"

"NO!" Gamzee threw the doll across the room and onto the floor. It was a disturbing sight to see the doll amazingly sitting upright against the bedroom corner simply staring at Gamzee with those glass eyes and disturbed smile. For the next hour or so Gamzee proceed to knot his fingers into his hair and cover his ears as the little puppet whispered thoughts of bloodshed into his ears and the boy helplessly listened to every word.

Eventually though his rocking slowed and eventually stopped. Sitting there, Gamzee stared at the wall for a good hour blank as could be while his mind ebbed into utter darkness seeming to have no return. After a long moment though it did, and with a blink he looked towards the setting sun out the window making his eyes widen in surprise.

"Woah. When did it get so motherfuckin late… I could have sworn I just ate breakfast a few minutes ago…" Gamzee laughed before shaking his head and slipping out of bed, "Must have fallen asleep."

Strolling over to his dresser Gamzee picked his phone up and began dialing Nepeta's number before placing it to his ear and listening to the ringing on the other end. Looking around the room as it rang though Gamzee's eyes landed on his favorite childhood toy and he frowned picking it up. "_Why the hell are you all the way over here… Did I do that… Why would I do that…"_ Gamzee frowned at the fuzzy lines and memories of just hours passed only to interrupted by Nepeta's voice.

"Hey babe what's up?" Nepeta questioned distractedly across the line.

"Hey ninjet. I know its late and I should have motherfuckin asked earlier but I guess I fell asleep and I know you been busy with your classes and all… Anyway I was motherfuckin wonderin if you wanted to go to Vriska's party tonight." Gamzee questioned as he looked at the doll in his hands with a frown.

"Awe shoot. Well, I would but my mom got home early this week and wanted to go out to dinner together. I'm sorry!" Nepeta answered slightly upset by the turn out of events.

"Nah kitty-bitch it's all motherfuckin good. I'll just stay home tonight." Gamzee replied before setting Cal back down on the bed.

"No no no!" Nepeta quickly spoke, "You go, have some fun and I'll see you tomorrow fur sure!"

Chuckling Gamzee smiled at the small pun she had placed in there, "Okay ninjet I will. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye!" Nepeta hung up then leaving a small dial tone before Gamzee hit end call himself and shoved the phone in his pocket. Walking over to the dresser he quickly changed his shirt and pants now that they were all crumpled up and wrinkled before strolling downstairs and out the door quickly heading for the Serket household.


	17. Isn't it Funny

Author's Notes:

Hey guys, so a bit about this chapter: There are some major trigger warnings in here due to the use of drugs. Hope you guys enjoy the finale.

Shout Outs:

Pinku Matsumoto: You know I've been asked if my shippings changed during a story before and my answer once again is no. Probably the reason you feel that is because I don't just talk about Gamzee and Nepeta singularily and only. Personally I feel a good story needs more than one character understanding so therefore you gotta give others a chance to speak. In this case Vriska.

Isn't it Funny

Gamzee grinned as he walked up the steps of the bass filled house and through the doorway. He had to admit that it was nice to be back in an environment he knew so well. Alcohol filled his nose and colors swam through his vision. All around people were bumping and grinding to a beat while other stood around yelling to be heard over the music. Nepeta was right. He needed to get out more often. It'd be good for him.

As the Capricorn was filling up a red solo cup with a fill of punch, a finger lightly tapped his shoulder. With drink in hand Gamzee turned around to see Vriska Serket with her arms crossed over her chest. Giving a small smirk she shouted above the noise, "Having fun?!"

Laughing Gamzee cupped his ear with his hand to signal that he couldn't hear her very well before she rolled her eyes and grabbed his shirt to lead him along. Vriska led him downstairs and to the basement were her bedroom was set up. A few people lingered here and there making out or talking about the room but the atmosphere was much more serene.

"I asked if you are having fun." Vriska tried again as Gamzee took a long swig from his drink and shrugged.

"Haven't been here long enough to really tell I guess." He replied before taking another drink as the two sat down with a good amount of space between them on her messed up bed.

Vriska nodded as she watched Gamzee empty his cup before she offered her own to him. For a moment though Gamzee hesitated and thought to himself, _What if she… No… She's a bitch but she wouldn't do that. _Gamzee's fingers wrapped around the offered glass before he took a long swig. Jeez he was thirsty.

For the next hour or so the two continued to converse about nothing at all in particular until colors slowly began to swim in Gamzee's vision, sounds began to mash into one great blob, and smells became overbearing…

"Ga…mze…e…" Someone's familiar voice called. Gamzee blinked looking at the blurred figures before him. He could swear he felt the thin fingers of someone pushing him back so he could look at the ceiling, he could feel the soft tickling sensation of cold air on the skin of his abdomen, and the faint smell of a feminine perfume. Where was he again? Oh yeah, Vriska's…

The sensations began to grow even more blurry it seemed. Touching, became groping, groping became kissing, and kissing lead to more trouble. Gamzee wasn't sure exactly how much time passed, minutes mixed with hours and all Gamzee could focus on was that someone was touching and yet he felt he had no control of his own movements. Part of him felt angered by this while the other part felt almost relieved to not have to feel anything…

And then it all came crashing down in one fell swoop.

Screaming. Someone was screaming at him about how much she hated him. There was still the pressure of someone on top of him as he sluggishly looked over in the direction of the angered voice. There his eyes brain slowly calculated the figure of Nepeta Leijon standing there with Equius holding her back. Tears streamed down the poor girls face as she screamed at him how much she hated him before Equius quickly picked her up into his arms and rushed her up the stair case and out of his sight.

Karkat was rushing over to him now, lifting whoever was on top of him off before helping up Gamzee as well. Karkat was saying something but, each word seemed to be too slow for Gamzee to really understand. "What motherfuck are you talking about man…" Gamzee tried to say only to feel his tongue stick to the roof of his mouth like tar.

Karkat, looked pissed. Shaking his head he looked away as if trying to regain control of himself before viscously bringing back his fist and making contact with Gamzee's face…

…

When Gamzee woke from the darkness around him his head felt like a million drums pounding at once. Slowly he looked to his side to catch the sight of a small digital alarm clock reading off one am. All around him was silence, but slowly, it was all coming back to him. Vriska had drugged him. He wasn't sure how far the two had gone, but it was far enough that when Nepeta showed up, she was boiling over with rage. Karkat had knocked him out, and probably dragged him back to his own house.

Pushing himself up from his bed he looked around the room before his eyes landed on Cal. His eyes quickly looked away.

He had to get to Nepeta.

Pulling out his phone from his back pocket Gamzee quickly dialed Nepeta's number and held it to his ear. As the phone rang he couldn't help letting his eyes fall back onto Cal. Gamzee stared at the doll as the other side finally clicked and Equius's voice answered. "Highblood. This is the only warning I will give you do you understand? Stay away from Nepeta. Don't even think about coming near her."

Gamzee swallowed as the call ended before he slipped the device back into his pocket and got up. Each movement pained his sore and aching body and his head thrummed at almost a deadly rate. Finaally standing up completely Gamzee picked up the doll before walking out the door and downstairs.

_I told you Gamzee…_

_ She never loved you…_

_ KILL HER._

_ KILL THEM ALL._

"That wouldn't be motherfuckin cool bro…" Gamzee muttered before walking into the kitchen and rummaging through the cabinets. He just… he just needed to not feel… For an hour or so at least…

_Hoo hoo! Gamzee don't be silly._

_ Only Little Cal loves you…_

Pills of all sorts fell onto the counter as Gamzee pushed them out of the way. Glasses filled with dried marijuana crashed to the ground and split into millions of pieces. Finally finding a needle and the proper substance Gamzee held each close to his chest as he walked across the glass cutting up his feet along the way. Drops of blood followed his trail and into the living room where he sat down everything.

"I'll just try a lil bit…" Gamzee muttered and licked his lips. It was his brother's stash, well at least he assumed it was what was left of it.

_Yes and then afterwards we'll have some real fun wont we Gamzee… He he hoo hoo._

"Yeah… motherfuckin fun," Gamzee replied to Cal before preparing the needle. "And in the morning… When I wake up… I'll make things better with Nepeta."

Gamzee smiled at the thought of that as he felt the needle prick his skin and slide in. The relief, the numbness, and the darkness soon followed. "Nepeta will forgive me… She loves me…and if we can't stay together, then at least I know Karkat and Equius will take care of her…" He muttered as his vision slowly slipped to blacks and greys.

He was fading. Gamzee Makara and all his troubles were fading. Slowly his head rolled from side to side. First he took in Lil Cal who was sitting there grinning. Cal had his arms wrapped about Gamzee's waist as he cooed sick dreams. Gamzee couldn't seem to rip his eyes away from the demon latching onto him so sweetly. Finally when his head did roll to the other side he had to look up a bit more to see his brother Kurloz frowning with a deep sadness before the two Makara's slipped their hands into one another's and faded into blackness. It's funny how history repeats itself, isn't it.

Author's Notes: Hi everyone! Sorry about the ending. I know. Gamzee dead. Makes everyone want to cry. I apologize really, I just don't do happy endings. And before anyone can get mad and be like, "Gamzee wouldn't kill himself over Nepeta!" That is not what happened. Accidental drug overdose happens all the time and Gamzee did that because he already had a high level of toxins in his system, plus meth is not cool.

On another note, I'm really going to miss you guys and I must say it's been fun while it lasted. I hope to be back soon but of course I can't really promise anything. Stay avid readers guys! 


	18. Epilogue

Author's Note:

My email was literally blown up with requests for an epilogue and honestly I thought that was a fair request and I had a bit more free time today so here you go guys. I did use only the terms such as "The Cancer" "The Leo" "The Scorpio" for a reason though. It is a type writing technique and I really like the atmosphere I personally felt it created for this scene.

Shout Outs:

Apocalypsebutterfly: Thank you very much.

Guest: I don't do happy endings. Happy endings are corny and unrealistic.

Moose of Terror: I'm so sorry it made you sad lol but that was kinda the point darlin. .

Epilogue

As rain poured down on the lonely five their eyes never left the casket as it made its way six feet under. Rain dripped off the Cancer's lashes as wrapped his arm about the Leo's waist to keep her from falling into the muddy ground. Beside him the Leo sobbed but for some reason the Cancer couldn't seem to hear. Part of him raged and seethed as it threatened to boil over while the other half of himself felt a piece of him break a little. He couldn't understand the emotions he was feeling. Anger towards the fact that so few had bothered to show up, at the fact his parents hadn't bothered to come back home, at the fact that the mortician hadn't painted his stupid clown face on. Pain for the fact that he hadn't been there to stop him…

_I should have been a better friend…_

The Leo clung to the Cancer as the coffin receded and dirt began to cover it up. Hiding her face into his coat she sobbed softly at the whole notion. If only she had picked up the phone instead of the Sagittarius. If only it had been her voice he had come home to instead. The Scorpio had confessed to all of what she had done and yet the town still said it was a successful suicide just like his brother had done. She wasn't mad at the Capricorn anymore. Now all she was just missing him desperately. At least he looked peaceful finally…

_I love you…_

Farther back from the mourning two the Scorpio stood under her spider web umbrella covering herself and two others as they watched each speck of dirt fell into the Capricorn's final resting place. She waited until finally the grave had been covered and the tent had been taken down. She had watched as the Leo and Cancer had passed her without even a second glance her way. At some point one of cherubs had left to go sit and wait in her car, refusing to let anyone see the tears about to pour down his face. He had to be strong after all. Calliborn left leaving just the Scorpio and Calliope shivering in the cold.

_I'm sorry I wasn't stronger…_

Calliope and the Scorpio finally stepped over towards the grave as it was finally made. The Cancer and Leo had left flowers with a horn bound to them. Calliope sniffled and put down a bottle of purple Faygo at his head stone. The two stood there for a bit longer before lightening crackled and they began walking away. Calliope looked over her shoulder and gave a small wave before muttering goodbye.


End file.
